I finished reading Wesley the Owl and I can't believe how good it was. I wrote a short review for it over in my goodreads bookshelf, but that definitely didn't do it justice. The book was beautiful, and so much more than a memoir. It brings in themes of science versus spirituality (and how the two actually go hand in hand, if you look at it from a certain perspective) and brings everything back to the Way of the Owl. The Way of the Owl has a lot to do with loyalty and emotion and respect, which are things that people need for all living creatures, not just other human beings.
Stacey O'Brien broke into the world of writing with this book, and although it sometimes shows I think that just makes the book all the more heartfelt and honest. She's not worrying about making the story masterfully crafted, or making it mean more than it is. The book is about her relationship with Wesley the owl, and the relationship is a beautiful one. If course, when it came time to describe Wesley's demise, I read the words but tried to speed through it as fast as I could, so that I would be able to stop crying asap. At that point, I felt that Wesley had taught me almost as much as he had taught Stacey, though of course that's impossible considering I only knew him for about 250 pages, and she had 19 years to fall in love.
I've never liked stories, even the most fictional ones, where animals are in trouble. I for some reason have no problem with it when people are in danger. I think this has a lot to do with conscious decisions. We decide to wage war (over what? Land?) and gun each other down. We waste precious time and energy designing the best ways to kill each other, when we could be putting a LOT more effort into efficient energy, understanding each other regardless of...well...everything..., etc. Now, I'm not at all pretending to understand how the intricacies of government run, or the ins and outs of politics. I do like living in society where there is a government in place and I think that we have been living in a time and place for centuries now that to decide against one would be foolish. However, I wish we didn't. I wish we could all get along without a problem, that we could let each other live in quiet harmony, share cups of sugar and loafs of bread. I wish no one would feel the need to steal, or commit any crime against another human being. I wish we could live more like our "lesser" animal societies do.
I'm not a fool. I know that animal societies are not all fun and games. There are wars against tribes and survival of the fittest and it's all very savage. But where's the harm in that? If you're too weak to keep up, why SHOULD the rest of your tribe slow down and risk getting hurt or running out of food? I'm sure that's some kind of weird philosophy that someone's going to point and me and be like GOD YOU'RE SUCH A MARXIST (I don't understand philosophy, either...) so whatever. Call me what you like. It may just be the living situation I'm in right now, but I don't think it's fair for the strongest member of the pack to have to support everyone else. Either learn to keep up or learn what it means to be left behind. Your fate is in your hands, not mine.
Anyhow. Back to the animal movies. I hate animal movies, for the most part, because I know they're going to begin or end in tragedy for the animals that I fall for the hardest. I can watch Finding Nemo in pieces, but not all at once. I can listen to The Lion King soundtrack all day long, but not the stampede music. And fuck if I'm going to watch that scene. On the flip side, I love Inglorious Basterds.
There's just something about animals getting hurt, even if they're bringing it upon themselves, or the causes are natural, that kills me every time.
This all got worse in spring 2009. April 2009. April 3, 2009.
That's when Blue went away. I was at Goucher, and I knew he was sick and when my mom was calling me a thousand times I knew why but I didn't want to hear about it. So I didn't, until late in the day. It was almost better that I wasn't there because I just couldn't handle it. I had to sit and say goodbye to SamWise the summer before, and it was all very abrupt and just sucked and I can't keep writing about it too much because really, it's not even something I can describe. So when I knew Blue had gone, too, I was almost (selfishly) glad I wasn't there. The only regret is not getting to say goodbye ever to him. Sure, I said it in prayer and thanked God he wasn't stuck here, on Earth, sick and in pain anymore. Because animals don't let you know when they're sick and in pain. In the wild, that would be their undoing. So my last memories of Blue are of him looking slightly older, a little thinner, but still in good spirits and...
It's been two years now. I've tried so hard not to think about it that I can't remember much. Just that he was there, and then he wasn't. I remember, of course, as we often do in situations like these, all the things I didn't do. I remember the times I pushed him out of my cereal bowl, the times I yelled at him for pooping on the floor, the times I didn't want to go out in the cold to walk him. I remember how terrible he smelled when he got sick, and none of us knew why.
I remember how gentle he was around CJ when she was home, and then I can't help thinking of when CJ left, too.
This is a dangerous path I'm on, but it's one that I really wanted to write about. It's a path I think about every time I consider getting a new pet. I have four parakeets at home that I hate not taking care of. I want them with me, I want to sit with their cages open listening to them sing. I get mad when they screech at each other, but I think I've learned from Stacey that they're just imitating what they used to hear Sarah and I do, which was scream pointlessly instead of just talking.
All of these pets relied (or still rely) on me, and any other pet I bring into my life will do the same. I think about all of this when I think about Buster, and I want to do right by him everywhere I did wrong by Blue. Of course, I do this sometimes to a fault when I slip him scraps of my food and take him everywhere with me in the car. But he's so small, "portable" may as well be in his name. And unlike Blue, Buster knows what it's like to truly be cast out in the cold and literally unloved. Blue should have been treated like the Knight that he was, instead of just like a dog.
I think one of the reasons I like Jer's family and his house so much is the animal presence. Even though it gives me allergies like whoa, I just love being there. The animals run the house, they're members of the family rather than an "other" presence, and that's how I want my pets to be. His whole family loves the pets like I've never seen a family love pets before. They really try to understand the way that the pets love and feel and why they act the way they act. They concede that the animals have a full gamut of emotions and can be just as easily depressed or excited as we human beings can. It's not only human nature to think and feel and react accordingly, it's animal nature, too.
Stacey talks about how Wesely brought spirituality into her life in an almost tangible way, how she could look into his eyes and see the vast expanse of the universe, and how it made her feel her place among the stars. My pets have done the same for me, but none so powerfully as CJ did. Regardless of the circumstances by which CJ came into my life, or the ones by which she almost was taken away, she was a gift from above. It was the most tumultuous, hopeless year ever (yes, moreso than the year that would follow) or would have been without Ceej. She brought tranquility, she took care of me when everyone else was more willing to abandon or scold me. She reminded me that there was something more than me at stake, and that there would always, eventually, be a tomorrow worth waiting for. She showed me what happiness and joy looked like in a time when those elements were literally vacant from my life. These are the kinds of things that only animals can do. People worry. People hold back. People have to take care of themselves before they worry about the girl who has given up on taking care of herself. CJ never did those things. Blue never did those things. Buster will never (really) do those things. CJ was perfect. People may always have flaws, but CJ was perfect. She showed Willow Bird exactly the same amount of care and respect that Blue showed her.
At the end of the day, losing a pet is one of the worst things in the world. People who don't understand this... I don't understand them. Taking a pet into your home, regardless of what kind of pet, is like having a kid, in my opinion. You are telling this creature that you're going to take care of it, no matter what. You're going to make sure the animal is comfortable, well fed, taken care of, happy. And in turn, the pet will thank you. You abandon that pet, and the pet knows what you've done and will never forget. They're incapable of forgiving. It's not that they don't want to forgive you, but they can't trust that you won't slip up again. (and really, if we all treated each other this way, don't you think maybe things would be better? I bet if we were all less forgiving, we would be less likely to abuse each others' trust. There's no REASON to treat another human being in a less than exemplary way. Try treating EVERYONE exactly the way you want to be treated, and see if anything changes.) I'm not saying that this is something I practice, but it sure is something I strive to practice. I certainly don't go around violating other peoples' trust, I would hope you'd be willing not to violate mine.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
I Want An Organizer For My Organizers
I am so tired.
I worked my first full day at my internship today, and seriously, time has not flown more swiftly while I'm at work in so very long. I was busy all day, I was challenged all day, I would think I was done when really that was just phase one. It was perfection.
And now I'm back in front of a computer, trying to continue to work (not for my internship. that would be insane.) except the server is down.
My Thinkgeek order came in today, and while it's just things I wanted for the apartment, I'm so happy it's here. It's little touches that will go into the new place that I don't have the space (or the trust in my housemates) to make happen, and I can't wait for that to change. I have so many ideas for this new place. Cody and I are going to build a fort. He is in charge of the flag. It's going to be awesome. There are going to be many pillows, and if we're super lucky, a bean bag chair of epic proportions.
There's going to be a lot more cooking and baking going on and the general mood of the place is going to be...better. I'm not going to dread coming home, I'm not going to be grumpy every time I'm there, and when I lay down to sleep I'm not going to have to wonder whether the front door was ever locked and if someone has forgotten to turn off the stove and IM NOT GOING TO HAVE TO PAY FOR EXTRANEOUS ELECTRICAL APPLIANCES WHICH ARE LEFT ON EVEN WHEN THEIR OWNERS ARE NOT HOME! Oh it's going to be glorious. I am so excited to go home and get the truck and load it up and move things out of this house. I don't even want to be associated with it any more.
Anyhow, it's been an incredibly long day jam packed with reading and writing and learning, and I need to go figure out what the hell is going on with that server.
~Jenisaur
I worked my first full day at my internship today, and seriously, time has not flown more swiftly while I'm at work in so very long. I was busy all day, I was challenged all day, I would think I was done when really that was just phase one. It was perfection.
And now I'm back in front of a computer, trying to continue to work (not for my internship. that would be insane.) except the server is down.
My Thinkgeek order came in today, and while it's just things I wanted for the apartment, I'm so happy it's here. It's little touches that will go into the new place that I don't have the space (or the trust in my housemates) to make happen, and I can't wait for that to change. I have so many ideas for this new place. Cody and I are going to build a fort. He is in charge of the flag. It's going to be awesome. There are going to be many pillows, and if we're super lucky, a bean bag chair of epic proportions.
There's going to be a lot more cooking and baking going on and the general mood of the place is going to be...better. I'm not going to dread coming home, I'm not going to be grumpy every time I'm there, and when I lay down to sleep I'm not going to have to wonder whether the front door was ever locked and if someone has forgotten to turn off the stove and IM NOT GOING TO HAVE TO PAY FOR EXTRANEOUS ELECTRICAL APPLIANCES WHICH ARE LEFT ON EVEN WHEN THEIR OWNERS ARE NOT HOME! Oh it's going to be glorious. I am so excited to go home and get the truck and load it up and move things out of this house. I don't even want to be associated with it any more.
Anyhow, it's been an incredibly long day jam packed with reading and writing and learning, and I need to go figure out what the hell is going on with that server.
~Jenisaur
Monday, June 13, 2011
Today's Blog Post Brought to you by History!
1. I love the idea behind the WPA. I seriously seriously do. From what I know of the program, it was a bit of genius on the part of FDR, it brought art and beauty across the nation and gave a whole bunch of people work. I want to know so much more than I do about these projects, and this book is a great start.
2. I love FDR. There are very few presidents I love more. I probably couldn't explain this in any kind of logical way, except that the ideas he proposed and then put into action, including the WPA and Fireside Chats (see photo above). He was a president of ideas AND of action. I want to know more about him, too.
3. The Federal Theatre Project, which was of course part of the WPA, is brilliant and fascinating and incredibly important to the history of theatre in America, and so few people ever learn about it. But they should. I want/need more context for this particular initiative.
4. The WPA holds a special place in my heart because, regardless of how I feel about current Stamford, the Stamford of the mid-20th century was being revived and made beautiful by various projects initiated as part of the WPA. It's one of the reasons that history was so interesting to me--one of the reasons I've always loved learning about the WPA--because I can see the actual results of it all around me every time I go home.
Alright. So WPA, FDR, Theatre, Stamford. Maybe it seems unrelated to the average consumer, but it's a list that seems perfectly logical to me. So I bought this book and I'm eventually going to read it. In the mean time, I want to explain a few things.
I learned about the WPA first in my tenth (eleventh? They all blur together...) grade American history class. It must have been eleventh grade, or maybe twelfth? I don't know at any rate it was one of those history classes with a teacher that takes literally no nonsense. Mr. Moriarty, or Coach Mo as we all referred to him, would lecture throughout the class period and if you paid any attention at all, asked a question or two, and wrote down every word he let fall out of his mouth, you had the answers to all the tests right in front of you. The thing is, he didn't ask for regurgitation, he asked for critical thinking. You passed his test by UNDERSTANDING what he lectured on, not regurgitating it. I wrote one of my favorite papers (still, to this day) for Coach Mo, about advertising in the 1960s and 1970s America, and I still remember a lot of what I learned while researching for that paper. This was where I first heard of the WPA. Not only did I hear of it, I actually got to see the results.
These murals, we were told by Coach Mo, were far from the only remaining evidence of the WPA. If we wanted a more intact example, all we had to do was enjoy a Friday night football game. So this is what it looked like when it was first built:
And here's a picture of what it looks like now (ish)
It's sort of awesome. But what's Stamford, in the grand scheme of things? So far away from Washington, D.C, so far from any decisions being made about war and depressions and anything important. Alright, so on the map of the U.S... you could definitely get farther away. But still. Not an important city.
Eh. Think again.
Stamford is actually a major commuting city, still today. It's only about a forty minute train ride to New York, and even before all the wonderful buildings and billboards and shiny, overpriced theatres, New York City was a big fucking deal. And you have to keep the people who keep the City running... running. So, according to Coach, FDR zoomed in specifically on Stamford. He sent out a great big greeting card to the City That Works (well, at that point, the City that WILL work, dammit!!) inviting us to develop and thrive, setting up theatres and a new satellite of the Whitney Museum, building stadiums and painting murals, and making the city beautiful on so many levels.
The city was full of so much promise, when someone was still promising it a future. Now, however, I don't see any of that in Stamford. At least, I don't see much. the Whitney has been taken out in favor of more offices, the stadium needs repairing, the library has truncated hours; the city is but a pale shadow of what FDR was so close to making it become. When I was a kid it was beautiful in so many ways. Now it makes me sad.
Because I've seen the murals, and the stadium, and the art museum and the theater, when it wasn't being infested by Jerry beads. (that's right. The stage where I once sat on the edge of my seat, watching the Hobbit and Curious George and countless productions of the Nutcracker... it's been handed over to trashtastic talk shows. It has literally become the sound stage for Jerry Springer. Or for Maury Povich. I suppose it depends on the day, and the stage... you can't make this stuff up.)
Alright, I'm totally off topic now.
The WPA. There we go. Back to the source. So Coach Mo shows us these murals and tells us that Boyle Stadium (that's what it's called, Boyle Stadium) were actually created as government initiatives to stimulate the job market, the economy, and the general loveliness of the City of Stamford, and I can't help thinking about all the other fancy tidbits I may have missed in the history of my hometown. I tried researching it, but guess what's a little bit not at all well documented (any more, anyhow)? A city that used to be so vital it was hand-chosen by the President to get special treatment, in a time when most of the country was starving, has been left to the vultures. How can I feel proud of a city that doesn't seem to take pride in itself?
At that point, however, I was still smitten with stamford (that should be on a t-shirt, though no one would buy it and even less people would actually wear it.) and I believed a great many things about what I also still considered My City.
It wasn't until my freshman year of college I found out about the Federal Theatre Project, and how some playwrights used the money doled out by the government...to undermine the government. We watched The Cradle Will Rock and Cradle Will Rock (yep, they're different. One is a play written and produced as part of the FTP, and the other is a movie about it's production and place in history. Both are fascinating.) and, although the soundtrack is atrocious, the story behind the whole affair is brilliant. Check it out if you have time. Angry writers (oh, and Orson Welles) decide to produce a play about unions and how they are a Good Thing and how Mr. Mr (the proverbial Man) is trying to keep the working man from working. Well. The government wasn't so crazy about this idea and even though the show was sold out, the theatre it was supposed to go up in was magically padlocked, props and costumes and all, on opening night. What does a cast and crew and group of musicians with a padlocked theater do?
Announce there has been a change in location, and march block and blocks away, picking up even more audience members on the way. So now they have a theatre, but no one can perform on the stage because it's a government production and they're all under contract. Well, everyone except the playwright, who sits on stage in front of a piano and plays. One by one, the actors stand from the audience and perform among audience members. Nothing in their contract against that.
The show is still performed from the audience in most productions today.
Oh Jeez. I've made it to my hour mark. I supposed I history nerded a little harder than I expected. Ah well. I suppose that must be the point. Go watch Cradle will Rock. There'll be a test on it.
~Jenisaur
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Inglorious Basterds always makes me want Apple Pastries and milk
It's late. I'm tired, I was editing the manuscript that I'm editing almost all day, and I'm going to start round two tomorrow on the train.
Ah yes. My internship begins tomorrow.
I have decided that a full hour every other day and about a half hour on the off days is a more realistic goal, especially with my new internship coming up and getting ready to move, and thinking about the dramaturgy project that's coming up (I'll be working on A Chorus Line at Montclair State in the fall!!)
Today we watched the final three specials of Doctor Who with David Tennant as the Doctor, and now there's going to have to be a lull before we get more Doctor fix because Season 5 is mad expensive. Except that I just found season 5 on netflix, so maybe when I'm done with this entry we will start watchingMax Matt Smith's seasons. We also watched the first X-Men movie, which I can't believe came out about eleven years ago.
Last night, I picked up my copy of the Writer's Yearbook 2011, and I found a billion excellent resources for working on my writing, from both a creative perspective and a business perspective. There's a whole new list of websites to visit, in order to get more familiar with the writing market, make myself more marketable and more of an internet presence. Both reading through the Yearbook, and reading the manuscript I'm editing (which is about being an educator and balancing an online presence as a writer... well... that's not precisely what the book is about, per say, but it plays a large role in the unfolding of the book...) make me fell great about keeping this blog. It means I've got somewhere to stretch and work out my writing muscles, as well as somewhere to continue building my portfolio. Being present and relevant are great things, and keeping up on this site, be it daily or every other day, will help me do that.
Days like these are the days when I know that writing isn't just something that was convenient. It's not something I'm JUST good at (though I hope that I am good at it... good enough for other people to enjoy reading what I've written as much as I enjoy writing it...), it's still something I HAVE TO DO. Reading about the market, and editing other writers' work, just feels natural. It feels like breathing and eating and making it through the day happy and satiated. It's the world in which I belong, and I'm so happy to be going into unfamiliar parts of that world tomorrow, with my internship.
Anyhow, it's getting sort of late and I've got to pack a backpack for tomorrow, so I'm going to take my internet leave for the evening. Tomorrow, I'd like to write a full blog post as well as a post about why I love Inglorious Basterds. Because I really really do. Night!!
~Jenisaur
Ah yes. My internship begins tomorrow.
I have decided that a full hour every other day and about a half hour on the off days is a more realistic goal, especially with my new internship coming up and getting ready to move, and thinking about the dramaturgy project that's coming up (I'll be working on A Chorus Line at Montclair State in the fall!!)
Today we watched the final three specials of Doctor Who with David Tennant as the Doctor, and now there's going to have to be a lull before we get more Doctor fix because Season 5 is mad expensive. Except that I just found season 5 on netflix, so maybe when I'm done with this entry we will start watching
Last night, I picked up my copy of the Writer's Yearbook 2011, and I found a billion excellent resources for working on my writing, from both a creative perspective and a business perspective. There's a whole new list of websites to visit, in order to get more familiar with the writing market, make myself more marketable and more of an internet presence. Both reading through the Yearbook, and reading the manuscript I'm editing (which is about being an educator and balancing an online presence as a writer... well... that's not precisely what the book is about, per say, but it plays a large role in the unfolding of the book...) make me fell great about keeping this blog. It means I've got somewhere to stretch and work out my writing muscles, as well as somewhere to continue building my portfolio. Being present and relevant are great things, and keeping up on this site, be it daily or every other day, will help me do that.
Days like these are the days when I know that writing isn't just something that was convenient. It's not something I'm JUST good at (though I hope that I am good at it... good enough for other people to enjoy reading what I've written as much as I enjoy writing it...), it's still something I HAVE TO DO. Reading about the market, and editing other writers' work, just feels natural. It feels like breathing and eating and making it through the day happy and satiated. It's the world in which I belong, and I'm so happy to be going into unfamiliar parts of that world tomorrow, with my internship.
Anyhow, it's getting sort of late and I've got to pack a backpack for tomorrow, so I'm going to take my internet leave for the evening. Tomorrow, I'd like to write a full blog post as well as a post about why I love Inglorious Basterds. Because I really really do. Night!!
~Jenisaur
Saturday, June 11, 2011
My new Printer/Scanner has its own email address...
Hi! So it looks like maybe every other day is the goal I'm going to be aiming for. Even in a month as quiet and relatively empty as June has been, writing for an hour each day has proven to be incredibly difficult. I spent the better part of yesterday in the city with Sara Z for her b-day and it was an incredibly exhausting day (I did not expect to be out in the sun for hours and was not hydrated enough...) but it was also awesome and full of new adventures for me and for Sara. I will definitely be writing about that today.
We started off taking a ferry to Governor's island where a group called Figment has artists come and install interactive art pieces. Not only was the art really cool and fun to play with, but the island used to be owned by the army or something and so there are all these buildings (including a library and gigantic fort, which is called Castle Williams) that are closed but still in excellent condition, being kept up by the city and what not. There are all these bikes that are free to ride around the island, and little cafe areas everywhere and a mini-beach and when ferrys drive past the wake makes the water crash up and over the seawall and you can stand at the fence and cool off your feet. It's a place I wish we had had more time to explore, because it really was beautiful but by the time we got there there was definitely a "packing up" vibe, and we were in the middle of a game of mini-golf on a course where each hole was designed by a different artist when men in golf carts with megaphones started driving around telling everyone the last ferry would be leaving soon and we had to head toward the docks.
Then we ventured into Chinatown, where I had also never been, and I honestly felt like I was in Epcot. I thought there was no way that Chinatown could really exist in the middle of New York (alright, so it's not the middle, but still. It was a weird dose of culture shock...) and we went to this vegetarian Dim Sum place. I had never had Dim Sum before, but the food was delicious (Sara was less impressed) even though the service was... weird. It was getting late so we had to part ways at that point, Sara apparently headed to a museum that was open until about 9 and I headed to Penn station, met up with Jeremy, and headed back to Montclair.
I used to go into New York all the time when I was in high school, and pretty much every winter and summer through the first couple years of college. The problem with those trips was that they never covered much of the city. For the most part, they consisted of heading straight from Grand Central to my destination, which was almost always a Broadway theatre. Sometimes I would walk around to Radio City Music Hall and Rockefeller Plaza and the Nintendo store, but rarely. In the past two or three years, however, I have explored whole new (to me, at least) sections of the city, starting with Greenwich Village on a trip with Goucher people about two years ago. Sarah (different Sarah.) and Eric and I headed straight from Times Square for the Village, where we had never been, and explored our hearts out. We were at Oscar Wilde bookstore the weekend it was closing. We had lunch at some hole in the wall where I got black bean soup. We sniffed the air at Magnolia's bakery (that was about all we could afford...) and then topped off the night with dinner at a bar/restaurant I couldn't find again if I tried. It was the first genuinely spontaneous day in the city I had ever experienced. Then last summer I followed Margaret and Hannah to a theatre where they had been putting in slave labor hours, and I passed Ground Zero for the first time ever- before or after 9/11. I couldn't stay long.
And just a couple weeks ago Margaret, Ben and I wandered about Chelsea before a Bowling for Soup concert at the Highline Ballroom. It's only starting to dawn on me now that I have barely even scraped the surface of what New York City really is, and even though none of the city makes me nearly as nervous as it's supposed to, I'm starting to realize how unfamiliar I really am with the greatest city in the world. Instead of depressing me, this actually makes me really really excited. This means that
1. New York does NOT have to drain my pockets. I spent MAYBE thirty bucks all day yesterday. The less expensive, the better, and actually I would wager good money that the off-broadway scene is way cooler than seeing Wicked sixty thousand times.
2. There is a ton of stuff to discover. Governor's Island is what really brought this home for me. My camera also died early in our time there, which bummed me out but also meant I wasn't seeing everything through a screen, but witnessing it first hand and participating in a lot of different installations that I may not have participated in if I was busy documenting it in photos.
3. Times Square is kind of boring. You can only wander through Toys R Us so many times--and this experience is made worse when your pockets are empty--before it becomes sort of depressing. Also, my old trips into the City were really consumer-centric, as in, the worth of the trip could be measured in what I brought home from it, in a tangible sense. These new trips I spend the train ride home thinking and mulling over the things I've seen and been a part of, and realizing all over again how New York really is something I just want to be a part of. Broadway is great, but discovering a new restaurant is even better, and experiencing art and meeting really interesting people for free is best of all.
Anyhow. I'm really pleased with these trips that have me riding the subway all over creation, and figuring out how to get back to Penn station without spending too much money, and walking until my feet are numb and collapsing into bed when I get home. I'm really excited to take other people on these adventures with me, especially Ali who has gone on more than one trip with me where most of the pictures we take are of billboards. I think she really would have loved the Figment experience, and so would Jer. I would have loved to explore the buildings more, Jer would love the bike riding, Ali would love all the art and the water...
I've also never done a few incredibly touristy things in New York, like visiting the Empire State Building, going inside the Statue of Liberty, and seeing the Imagine Memorial in Central Park. These are all on my bucket list.
On that same note, while I was sitting in Borders waiting for Sara to arrive, I came up with a new idea: A Shame list. This would be a list of things we're embarrassed we haven't done yet. Like, never going inside the Empire State Building or never reading Animal Farm or never seeing Singin' in the Rain. This is more than just a bucket list. This is a different, albeit similar, kind of list. I'm going to be building my shame list soon, and hopefully start working on it with Margaret soon after that. Exploring New York is part of my shame list, and I'm so happy that I've begun chipping away at it.
Of course, this will get easier once I'm working in the Village three days a week... which begins this coming Monday!
I'm about twenty minutes away from the end of my hour, and I don't know what else to write about. I got a new scanner/printer today, and it's a much bigger deal than it should be. This is only the second printer I have ever owned and the first one was so brilliant that I cringe to think that I had to swap it out. I'm going to be giving my old printer (which was a high school graduation gift from my Grammy) to my sister, who will probably be heading to college herself in about a year and even if she stays at home she will need a printer of her own. It's the best printer ever- I have literally never had a problem with it- and if Caitlin doesn't want it, and Lauryn doesn't want it, then I will keep it and have two printers just for the hell of it until they stop making ink for the original printer. That's how good this sucker was. The problem, of course, was that this old trooper didn't print photos very well and it didn't have a scanner... which is what led me to the printer section at Target in the first place.
But this new printer (his name is Winston.) has a scanner, and it's wireless, and it has its own email address that I can send things to it from anywhere in the world and it will print. Like a fax machine, only sexier. Also, this new printer is an HP, just like the old one, so I feel like at least I'm keeping it in the family. I guess. If Winston is anywhere near as reliable as the old Printer, then I will have him for at least six years without any problems.
I guess that's all I've got to say today. With any luck, I'll be back tomorrow.
~Jenisaur
We started off taking a ferry to Governor's island where a group called Figment has artists come and install interactive art pieces. Not only was the art really cool and fun to play with, but the island used to be owned by the army or something and so there are all these buildings (including a library and gigantic fort, which is called Castle Williams) that are closed but still in excellent condition, being kept up by the city and what not. There are all these bikes that are free to ride around the island, and little cafe areas everywhere and a mini-beach and when ferrys drive past the wake makes the water crash up and over the seawall and you can stand at the fence and cool off your feet. It's a place I wish we had had more time to explore, because it really was beautiful but by the time we got there there was definitely a "packing up" vibe, and we were in the middle of a game of mini-golf on a course where each hole was designed by a different artist when men in golf carts with megaphones started driving around telling everyone the last ferry would be leaving soon and we had to head toward the docks.
Then we ventured into Chinatown, where I had also never been, and I honestly felt like I was in Epcot. I thought there was no way that Chinatown could really exist in the middle of New York (alright, so it's not the middle, but still. It was a weird dose of culture shock...) and we went to this vegetarian Dim Sum place. I had never had Dim Sum before, but the food was delicious (Sara was less impressed) even though the service was... weird. It was getting late so we had to part ways at that point, Sara apparently headed to a museum that was open until about 9 and I headed to Penn station, met up with Jeremy, and headed back to Montclair.
I used to go into New York all the time when I was in high school, and pretty much every winter and summer through the first couple years of college. The problem with those trips was that they never covered much of the city. For the most part, they consisted of heading straight from Grand Central to my destination, which was almost always a Broadway theatre. Sometimes I would walk around to Radio City Music Hall and Rockefeller Plaza and the Nintendo store, but rarely. In the past two or three years, however, I have explored whole new (to me, at least) sections of the city, starting with Greenwich Village on a trip with Goucher people about two years ago. Sarah (different Sarah.) and Eric and I headed straight from Times Square for the Village, where we had never been, and explored our hearts out. We were at Oscar Wilde bookstore the weekend it was closing. We had lunch at some hole in the wall where I got black bean soup. We sniffed the air at Magnolia's bakery (that was about all we could afford...) and then topped off the night with dinner at a bar/restaurant I couldn't find again if I tried. It was the first genuinely spontaneous day in the city I had ever experienced. Then last summer I followed Margaret and Hannah to a theatre where they had been putting in slave labor hours, and I passed Ground Zero for the first time ever- before or after 9/11. I couldn't stay long.
And just a couple weeks ago Margaret, Ben and I wandered about Chelsea before a Bowling for Soup concert at the Highline Ballroom. It's only starting to dawn on me now that I have barely even scraped the surface of what New York City really is, and even though none of the city makes me nearly as nervous as it's supposed to, I'm starting to realize how unfamiliar I really am with the greatest city in the world. Instead of depressing me, this actually makes me really really excited. This means that
1. New York does NOT have to drain my pockets. I spent MAYBE thirty bucks all day yesterday. The less expensive, the better, and actually I would wager good money that the off-broadway scene is way cooler than seeing Wicked sixty thousand times.
2. There is a ton of stuff to discover. Governor's Island is what really brought this home for me. My camera also died early in our time there, which bummed me out but also meant I wasn't seeing everything through a screen, but witnessing it first hand and participating in a lot of different installations that I may not have participated in if I was busy documenting it in photos.
3. Times Square is kind of boring. You can only wander through Toys R Us so many times--and this experience is made worse when your pockets are empty--before it becomes sort of depressing. Also, my old trips into the City were really consumer-centric, as in, the worth of the trip could be measured in what I brought home from it, in a tangible sense. These new trips I spend the train ride home thinking and mulling over the things I've seen and been a part of, and realizing all over again how New York really is something I just want to be a part of. Broadway is great, but discovering a new restaurant is even better, and experiencing art and meeting really interesting people for free is best of all.
Anyhow. I'm really pleased with these trips that have me riding the subway all over creation, and figuring out how to get back to Penn station without spending too much money, and walking until my feet are numb and collapsing into bed when I get home. I'm really excited to take other people on these adventures with me, especially Ali who has gone on more than one trip with me where most of the pictures we take are of billboards. I think she really would have loved the Figment experience, and so would Jer. I would have loved to explore the buildings more, Jer would love the bike riding, Ali would love all the art and the water...
I've also never done a few incredibly touristy things in New York, like visiting the Empire State Building, going inside the Statue of Liberty, and seeing the Imagine Memorial in Central Park. These are all on my bucket list.
On that same note, while I was sitting in Borders waiting for Sara to arrive, I came up with a new idea: A Shame list. This would be a list of things we're embarrassed we haven't done yet. Like, never going inside the Empire State Building or never reading Animal Farm or never seeing Singin' in the Rain. This is more than just a bucket list. This is a different, albeit similar, kind of list. I'm going to be building my shame list soon, and hopefully start working on it with Margaret soon after that. Exploring New York is part of my shame list, and I'm so happy that I've begun chipping away at it.
Of course, this will get easier once I'm working in the Village three days a week... which begins this coming Monday!
I'm about twenty minutes away from the end of my hour, and I don't know what else to write about. I got a new scanner/printer today, and it's a much bigger deal than it should be. This is only the second printer I have ever owned and the first one was so brilliant that I cringe to think that I had to swap it out. I'm going to be giving my old printer (which was a high school graduation gift from my Grammy) to my sister, who will probably be heading to college herself in about a year and even if she stays at home she will need a printer of her own. It's the best printer ever- I have literally never had a problem with it- and if Caitlin doesn't want it, and Lauryn doesn't want it, then I will keep it and have two printers just for the hell of it until they stop making ink for the original printer. That's how good this sucker was. The problem, of course, was that this old trooper didn't print photos very well and it didn't have a scanner... which is what led me to the printer section at Target in the first place.
But this new printer (his name is Winston.) has a scanner, and it's wireless, and it has its own email address that I can send things to it from anywhere in the world and it will print. Like a fax machine, only sexier. Also, this new printer is an HP, just like the old one, so I feel like at least I'm keeping it in the family. I guess. If Winston is anywhere near as reliable as the old Printer, then I will have him for at least six years without any problems.
I guess that's all I've got to say today. With any luck, I'll be back tomorrow.
~Jenisaur
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Quick check-in and then I'm off to work on tonight's challenge.
Hi! I'm going to be handwriting tonight for a change of pace. I'm hoping to find an inexpensive scanner this weekend, and then I'll scan in what I'm counting for tonight's entry. It's an exercise in character development, and I'm really excited to try it, so... I hope something interesting comes of it!
I'm taking the main character of the Rose Planet books-Rini- and working on figuring her out, as more than just a projection of me when I was twelve. Wish me luck!!
~Jenisaur
I'm taking the main character of the Rose Planet books-Rini- and working on figuring her out, as more than just a projection of me when I was twelve. Wish me luck!!
~Jenisaur
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Cold-Brew iced tea still confuses me
I'm going to be honest. I'm totally at a loss re: what to write about today. I got sort of distracted yesterday and didn't write, so article number one is that I need a penalty. Plus, I don't really know what to write about today, and I had real work while I was at the school today, so I didn't even do anything to build towards my challenge tonight. Plus, I really have to pee so I'm going to have to take a short break from the hour solid to go use the facilities.
Back.
I'm sort of in a totally unjustified rut. I'm in a pretty good place in general (in every sense but the geographic one...) and I have no reason to be feeling the way I've been feeling this week. Maybe it's the weather. I don't even have any good guesses as far as what could be getting me this down. I need a break, I think. Sunday was the first day in a really long time where I literally did nothing, and it was glorious. I need more days like Sunday. And now My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding is on, which is... weird. I am so distracted by the giant dresses.
Okay I just lost ten minutes staring at the tele. Where the hell did that show come from? And why are eight years olds dropping it like it's hot?
I really think I should take a few days off from the challenge proper and redesign it. Or maybe now that I'm not doing my assisstantship anymore for the summer, I'll have a little time to think about what I'm going to do for the rest of the month. I feel like I should push myself further than I ever have before, and I like the ideas behind this challenge, I'm just getting lazy and it's only a week in. I can't miss any more days, I think it would just depress me to give up now. So what should I write about for the next hour? That, I guess, is the million dollar question.
I want to get more organized. I would really like to start moving things out of this house to other locations-mostly up to Stamford since we can't move it anywhere else really... because we don't know where we're going to be moving to. That might be the thing that's really bugging me right now, is being so close to moving while still being so far away. I want to get the hell out of here and start living in a place I actually like with Jeremy. I think being able to decorate the apartment however we want and only having to worry about each other is going to be a huge change and I can't wait, because I am so sick of this house and all the lazy bullshit that ensues here it's really absurd.
I'm looking forward to not keeping things like garbage bags and toilet paper on the floor in our bedroom, and not having to throw out garbage bags full of rotten food once every two weeks. I'm looking forward to a lot of things, and they're far enough away on the horizon that for right now it's frustrating.
In the mean time I sit around trying to make the best of what's kind of a shitty situation, and you can only do that so much before you just get defeated and frustrated.
I apologize this challenge was not supposed to be about me griping, although getting the gripe out onto the page (be it digital or not) may help with this creative roadblock I seem to be hitting. There was something about writer's block in the imagineering workout... hold on ooooone second
*jeopardy music plays*
Okay. A quick thumb through of the book reminded me of three things:
1. to stay positive. Maybe it's just because it's coming from the imagineers. Maybe it's there all the time and I just forget (most likely) or maybe I can't help smiling when I see Figment, but this advice is pretty solid. I'm feeling a little better already, especially considering that thing number two is:
2. regardless of what you think re: the quality of what's being recorded, you can only get through writer's block by continuing to work, especially if you have a deadline. I am going to keep writing today's entry, because "won't" and "can't" HAVE to come out of my vocabulary. I have to stop being so hard on myself and even though I love Yoda and believe all of his advice, there is such a thing as try. I think Yoda knows that, too. I think what he's saying to Luke isn't that there's no such THING as try, but that you can't have the attitude that trying is good enough. You either do something, or you don't. If plan A falls through, there's always a Plan B and as soon as you shrug and think "ah well. At least I tried" you've already failed. Just keep going and doing and swimming, and eventually the pay off will come. And on a slightly related note:
3. Changing gears is okay. So the first rigid set of rules for the challenge are proving to be a bit self-defeating. Plan B goes into effect now. I'm going to write for an hour every day, best case scenario it's going to be about a new movie, article, project, etc. The topic HAS to be new, and the writing HAS to happen for an hour. Everything else is relative. Penalty for not writing still has to happen, and it can be more writing, if I so choose, but it has to be decided and completed within a week of the original offense or else more penalty gets tacked on.
I have to edit for Elizabeth tonight. I am love love loving her book so far, which makes it infinitely easier to edit, because I want to help make it even better. I hate editing things that aren't fun to read, because I feel like the writer won't be able to benefit from my edits because I have no stock in the piece itself. But I like Elizabeth's book, I feel that I can sympathize with her, and I want to work on it until it's perfect. Unfortunately, that project DOES have a deadline, and it's coming up soon, so I better get crackin because I NEVER get work done on the weekends, even though I really need to start.
My internship starts on Monday! Well, technically it doesn't. Monday is orientation day, so I don't think that technically counts as the first day. But I'll be doing something new, and fun, and challenging and something I def. can't take home with me, so that will be stellar. It will be a nice change of pace to have some guidance and supervision, so that I'll actually know what my bosses want from me as opposed to... other places I have worked.
You know, an hour has never been as long as it is when I'm writing these entries, but then I inevitable stumble upon something I like with like five minutes to spare and then I end up writing frantically to make up for the time lost staring into space while I'm at the half-way mark like I am now. I'm going to write a list of things I would like to work on next week in the challenge:
1. Working through the AP stylebook. I need to know about how journalism actually works, in the real world, as opposed to my strange, specialized free-lance world.
2. Reading Wesley the Owl.
3. Editing By the Sound.
4. Starting work on A Chorus Line dramaturgy.
5. Writing about Music- reinstate Blink 182sdays. Find out where that takes you.
6. New Crafting project. This can be a craft in the design stages.
7. Searching for people who don't want to be found.
That seems like a pretty solid week. Some nice variety. At the very least, I'll stumble on something interesting, and get to flex some muscles I haven't flexed in a while. I still need to do an hour of exercise as a penalty for my mis-step last Friday. This Friday I better write early, because I'm going into the city with Miss Sara Z for her b-day and we're going to go to a museum that has as of yet been undetermined. Although I could wait to write until the end of the day... that could be my field trip challenge. Anyhow. It's been an hour(ish) and I'm too fascinated by this gypsy shit... I want to get back to watching this show. I will be back tomorrow. <3
~Jenisaur
Back.
I'm sort of in a totally unjustified rut. I'm in a pretty good place in general (in every sense but the geographic one...) and I have no reason to be feeling the way I've been feeling this week. Maybe it's the weather. I don't even have any good guesses as far as what could be getting me this down. I need a break, I think. Sunday was the first day in a really long time where I literally did nothing, and it was glorious. I need more days like Sunday. And now My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding is on, which is... weird. I am so distracted by the giant dresses.
Okay I just lost ten minutes staring at the tele. Where the hell did that show come from? And why are eight years olds dropping it like it's hot?
I really think I should take a few days off from the challenge proper and redesign it. Or maybe now that I'm not doing my assisstantship anymore for the summer, I'll have a little time to think about what I'm going to do for the rest of the month. I feel like I should push myself further than I ever have before, and I like the ideas behind this challenge, I'm just getting lazy and it's only a week in. I can't miss any more days, I think it would just depress me to give up now. So what should I write about for the next hour? That, I guess, is the million dollar question.
I want to get more organized. I would really like to start moving things out of this house to other locations-mostly up to Stamford since we can't move it anywhere else really... because we don't know where we're going to be moving to. That might be the thing that's really bugging me right now, is being so close to moving while still being so far away. I want to get the hell out of here and start living in a place I actually like with Jeremy. I think being able to decorate the apartment however we want and only having to worry about each other is going to be a huge change and I can't wait, because I am so sick of this house and all the lazy bullshit that ensues here it's really absurd.
I'm looking forward to not keeping things like garbage bags and toilet paper on the floor in our bedroom, and not having to throw out garbage bags full of rotten food once every two weeks. I'm looking forward to a lot of things, and they're far enough away on the horizon that for right now it's frustrating.
In the mean time I sit around trying to make the best of what's kind of a shitty situation, and you can only do that so much before you just get defeated and frustrated.
I apologize this challenge was not supposed to be about me griping, although getting the gripe out onto the page (be it digital or not) may help with this creative roadblock I seem to be hitting. There was something about writer's block in the imagineering workout... hold on ooooone second
*jeopardy music plays*
Okay. A quick thumb through of the book reminded me of three things:
1. to stay positive. Maybe it's just because it's coming from the imagineers. Maybe it's there all the time and I just forget (most likely) or maybe I can't help smiling when I see Figment, but this advice is pretty solid. I'm feeling a little better already, especially considering that thing number two is:
2. regardless of what you think re: the quality of what's being recorded, you can only get through writer's block by continuing to work, especially if you have a deadline. I am going to keep writing today's entry, because "won't" and "can't" HAVE to come out of my vocabulary. I have to stop being so hard on myself and even though I love Yoda and believe all of his advice, there is such a thing as try. I think Yoda knows that, too. I think what he's saying to Luke isn't that there's no such THING as try, but that you can't have the attitude that trying is good enough. You either do something, or you don't. If plan A falls through, there's always a Plan B and as soon as you shrug and think "ah well. At least I tried" you've already failed. Just keep going and doing and swimming, and eventually the pay off will come. And on a slightly related note:
3. Changing gears is okay. So the first rigid set of rules for the challenge are proving to be a bit self-defeating. Plan B goes into effect now. I'm going to write for an hour every day, best case scenario it's going to be about a new movie, article, project, etc. The topic HAS to be new, and the writing HAS to happen for an hour. Everything else is relative. Penalty for not writing still has to happen, and it can be more writing, if I so choose, but it has to be decided and completed within a week of the original offense or else more penalty gets tacked on.
I have to edit for Elizabeth tonight. I am love love loving her book so far, which makes it infinitely easier to edit, because I want to help make it even better. I hate editing things that aren't fun to read, because I feel like the writer won't be able to benefit from my edits because I have no stock in the piece itself. But I like Elizabeth's book, I feel that I can sympathize with her, and I want to work on it until it's perfect. Unfortunately, that project DOES have a deadline, and it's coming up soon, so I better get crackin because I NEVER get work done on the weekends, even though I really need to start.
My internship starts on Monday! Well, technically it doesn't. Monday is orientation day, so I don't think that technically counts as the first day. But I'll be doing something new, and fun, and challenging and something I def. can't take home with me, so that will be stellar. It will be a nice change of pace to have some guidance and supervision, so that I'll actually know what my bosses want from me as opposed to... other places I have worked.
You know, an hour has never been as long as it is when I'm writing these entries, but then I inevitable stumble upon something I like with like five minutes to spare and then I end up writing frantically to make up for the time lost staring into space while I'm at the half-way mark like I am now. I'm going to write a list of things I would like to work on next week in the challenge:
1. Working through the AP stylebook. I need to know about how journalism actually works, in the real world, as opposed to my strange, specialized free-lance world.
2. Reading Wesley the Owl.
3. Editing By the Sound.
4. Starting work on A Chorus Line dramaturgy.
5. Writing about Music- reinstate Blink 182sdays. Find out where that takes you.
6. New Crafting project. This can be a craft in the design stages.
7. Searching for people who don't want to be found.
That seems like a pretty solid week. Some nice variety. At the very least, I'll stumble on something interesting, and get to flex some muscles I haven't flexed in a while. I still need to do an hour of exercise as a penalty for my mis-step last Friday. This Friday I better write early, because I'm going into the city with Miss Sara Z for her b-day and we're going to go to a museum that has as of yet been undetermined. Although I could wait to write until the end of the day... that could be my field trip challenge. Anyhow. It's been an hour(ish) and I'm too fascinated by this gypsy shit... I want to get back to watching this show. I will be back tomorrow. <3
~Jenisaur
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)